So it seems I have a kink. Part Four

My next relationship lasted almost a decade. It was… safe. Everything about it. I resigned myself to the idea that I was one of those people who just couldn’t have orgasms. After a few years, I started reading erotica online, and once again I was drawn to the BDSM stories, but they were mostly about […]

So it seems I have a kink. Part Three

My next relationship started when I was 18. Initially long-distance, we quickly got engaged and moved in together. It was a relationship of highs and lows, and looking back on it now, I can see the warning signs I missed. He had a lot more experience than me, and I naïvely assumed that meant he […]

So it seems I have a kink. Part Two

My first boyfriend was dull as wallpaper paste. No idea what my 15-year-old self saw in him, except that at 21 he seemed a little more sophisticated than my peers. Losing our virginities was anti-climactic, as was every encounter we had afterwards. He seemed remarkably uninterested in sex, I’m not sure if that was with […]

So it seems I have a kink. Part One

This isn’t really a surprise to me. I’ve been fascinated by BDSM since I first stole my mother’s New Woman magazines and read the clumsy exposés of life inside the Dominatrix dungeons. Even at the age of ten or so, I was intrigued by the dynamic, the balance of power. The story they told was […]

The Elephant in the Conference Centre

Somebody in the community has blocked me on Twitter. I have been aware of this for a few months now, and it has slightly puzzled me. I have blocked and been blocked several times; out of frustration, after discussions turned uncivilised, or for mental health reasons. I am not aware of having any interactions with […]